Oh, the Horror!

…of finding a new blog to read!  Keeping with My Halloween themed posts…

Freshly Pressed

Word Press’ “freshly pressed,” often times there isn’t anything that interests me.  Scratch that- most of the time.  Some I’m like,  HOW THE HELL did that make freshly pressed?  Did they get past the hounds of hell by selling their soul?  If I want news, I’ll watch one of the major networks.  So unless you got an interesting or personal take on the event or a humorous thought on something, I don’t care.  Which leads me to…

Genre Tags

Seriously, when I click Word Press’ “humor” tag, I have discovered what I find funny and what other’s deem humorous, are two different things.  Half the time, I leave feeling like an arrow pierced my brain.  WTF did I just read?  That was ghastly.

The only thing more frightening… are the zombie’sque posts listed under family, motherhood, mom, parenting genres  – As Shaggy and Scooby would say ZOINKS! YIKES!  LET’S GET OUTTA HERE.  First of all, aren’t there any parents of older children blogging?  Mine are 9 and 11 and still have somewhat amusing stories to relate or other topics for discussion outside of family matters.  Mostly, I’ve come across parents of infants / toddlers.  If I have to read one more “lecture” or “how to” on parenting- without a fresh/humorous personal view/spin to it… I’m going to go BATTY.   I love you moms, and want to support other mommy bloggers like myself, but MANNNN.  Or, as my stepsister used to say as a child, “Maneaters!”  You are not Dr. Phil, nor do I want to reread a regurgitation of what Dr. Spock, or Oz says.  Stop trying to market your blog, stop telling us what we need to do, and actually write articles that aren’t tired, and most importantly unique to separate yourselves from the masses.  Link something Dr. Spock wrote to an anecdote/personal family experience.  Make it interesting, Please, I beg of thee.

Liking Posts and Gravatar links

I’ve even clicked my favorite blogs, and those other bloggers that have “liked” their particular blog post, I will click over to that person’s site to see who they are if they are someone I’d like to follow.

First of all, BOO to those bloggers that have a Gravatar, and write a bunch info on the sidebar, clearly wanting you to follow them… but there’s NO LINK to their blog.  Double Oreo BOO to those that have like 5 sites linked.  I get too confused to

Did I just die?

decide which link I want to click.  When I do, inevitably it’s the one with fictional writing… I rarely read fictional writing because most of them are so boring I nearly expire and feel like a skeleton.  I prefer real life stories/drama- there’s plenty of material if you look.  I quickly move on…

Background

Site appearance makes a difference, trust me.  Today, I came across a warm pink, floral/petal like blog.  “If their intent was to make it look like a vagina, they were successful.” was all I kept thinking.  It looks like a gyna-looks like a gyna.  I couldn’t stay long enough to read the content.  Not that there’s anything wrong with womanly body parts, but when the blog is not pertaining to womanly matters…and the first post you see has skull and cross bones images…  I don’t know about you Ghouls, but who wants to associate a vajay-jay with skull and cross bones?  Fuck, let’s add some cobwebs too, why not?  BEWARE- stay out!

I GIVE UP… REFERRALS, PLEASE?

Can you maniacs make some referrals?  Only 1 referral (in the comments) that is not plugging your own blog.  I will visit your blog no matter because you responded.  Before commenting, if you can view my “favorites” page first to ensure I don’t already follow them?  I’m serious.  I need new material to read outside of my favorites.  What better way to find other blogs to haunt than via referrals from my current blogging buddies?

TIA

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19 thoughts on “Oh, the Horror!

  1. Parental advice?

    Uh, my kids never listened to me, why would I expect other parents to? On second thought, it would be nice if someone listened to us. My kids are in their late twenties and early thirties – which means they survived me, so yeah, I guess I can give advice.

    I highly recommend Milk & Whiskey. They are a brother and sister blogging team who write about their childhood and their parenting experiences… Milk calls her child “madness” which might provide a clue.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Welcome “Almost Iowa” – I’m guessing you’re near Iowa somewhere? Got a name you want to share?

      I’m Sandi. Welcome! I’ll swing by your blog next week. Today, we have soccer and a Halloween party. We’re still making our “skateboards” for our skater costumes. Ha! 🙂

      And then we have to travel to San Diego for some more soccer tomorrow (2 hour drive from OC)…

      So this gal is crazy. I tried to clarify earlier…I’m a mommy blog myself. I love to post scenarios with my kids (they are 9 and 11) and try to make them humorous (best I can) or at least interesting. By no means, do I tell others how to raise their kids. 🙂 Damn, if I don’t fail everyday.

      (Um…you probably shouldn’t have done that…you think?)

      Unless, something drastic happens and I tell my story and suggest that others might want to avoid my scenario. (hahaha) 🙂 I seriously can’t believe someone allowed us to be parents.

      HA! There’s a post in that comment somewhere, as I just remember something the pediatrician told us at my son’s 1 year check-up… 11 years ago. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

    2. Hey Sandi, I am Greg, though most people on my blog call me Iowa. Actually I live in Central Minnesota, not far from the Iowa border. It’s farm country and I am a city-boy. Most of my writing is humor, based on life around here and around the house. I get a kick out of stories about kids – it makes me more appreciative of having gone through all that. 🙂

      Like

  2. I saw you on Holes In My Socks blog.
    I don’t know if you will this humorous, but I enjoy https://blondewritemore.wordpress.com
    I checked. Not on your list of favorites.
    I have to agree with you about the number of blogs out there that are a. boring, b. come from women with small children who don’t have any idea of what’s really waiting for them in parenthood, and c. lots of advice from people who also haven’t walked in my shoes.
    I have 3 grown sons, 34, 31, and 27. You have a lot left to experience with your children!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hi, welcome- is it Jude? (going off your heyjude6119) – I’m Sandi!

      I’ll swing by your blog momentarily. Thanks for visiting. AND YES, I agree, I still have much to experience with my children- since they are only 9 and 11 (soon to be 10 and 12)… that’s why I record things here as a journal of sorts. (and Facebook) It allows me to vent in a humorous (and sometimes serious) way depending on the nature of the subject. 🙂

      Then I can scroll back and look at the funny stories, or events that took place. See if there was anything I thought was so drastic at the time, that later we can say “Wow, why was I so worried over that?”

      I actually have another blog from years ago that all my friends/family read that recorded all the stuff as toddlers and what jobs I held at that time.

      As the kiddos got older, I had to stop posting to that site and created an entirely different site for more anonymity that our family/friends don’t know about… where I can freely tell some of these stories without the kids getting embarrassed by classmates, etc. (many of the parents that followed my other blog have students at the same school)

      So, they are not linked in any way.

      I don’t just post about my family, but any random thoughts or things I find funny, odd, interesting. My blogging goal is to make friends. That’s it. Simple.

      🙂

      Like

  3. Love this post! Parenting bloggers who try to sound like they are god’s gift to parenting drive me bonkers! I agree everybody has a different sense of humor but for pete sakes some of the crap you find under humor wouldn’t be funny even if you wear blind. Nothing irks me more though than the gravatar profile that has a resume to the left and not one freaking link to a blog!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m glad to see I’m not the only one pulling my hair and saying “What the hell is going on?”

      You know what I am truly loving… this influx of males/father bloggers…like all the guys I’m currently following… Gary (you), Paul, Scott, Dan…I LOVE the dad perspective. All of you are unique and face similar and different challenges. I’m grateful to have found your blogs. 🙂

      Interesting thing about you, you call the BS as you see it. Oh, that’s crap and you know it. – I can appreciate that.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Here’s one that’s actually pretty funny, Sandi.
    http://listfulthinking.org/
    She doesn’t seem to interact lots with her readers though, so don’t plan on striking up a blogging friendship. But the writing is good and the humor is fresh, so you might like it. I have another blog friend who is a very good writer, but he’s taking time off ( I hope to work on his novel). As for Freshly Pressed, I appreciate the exposure it gives, but lately it seems to have morphed into the Huffington Post, which is fine if you like that sort of thing, but there seems to be very little variety of perspectives there anymore.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hey there! I will check that link out and thank you for the feedback on it… that’s fine, I don’t always need someone to respond to me. The larger following the blogger has, it’s nearly impossible for them to interact with all that visit.

      Yes, I agree, I can appreciate the “exposure” Freshly press gives to some deserving bloggers. I’m just disappointed, more often, there isn’t much material I’m interested in reading. I have read a few intriguing pieces and will stop by, on occasion, to see the latest and greatest. However, there are times, more frequently, I’m dumbfounded that a particular article (Or two) have been placed there. Many drag on for days. I’m sorry, but no, not going to read 1,000+ words. I’m just not. (Unless we have a rapport already established) I’d read your material. 🙂

      Who is this other “masked” blogger friend supposedly working on his novel? I must know!

      Like

    2. I try to keep my posts to 500 words, so you don’t have to rely upon your rapport with me to keep you going past 1000. The only things I have on my blogs that are that long are the fiction samples, but since they are fiction, you probably wouldn’t be interested anyway.
      Here’s the link to my “masked” friend.
      http://joneekhoff.com/
      He hasn’t posted in a while but his writing is very powerful. His family went through a health crisis recently and his posts about it are very touching. I hope he gets back to blogging soon.

      Liked by 1 person

    3. Yikes, I hope his family is on the mend. I certainly can appreciate serious posts, as well.

      And, I didn’t represent myself clearly, I don’t mind fictional writing. I just don’t want several words, strewn across the page, that are not put together in an interesting way. Unfortunately, this pertains to several bloggers.

      If you’re a good writer, I’d be reading intently and not realizing it from the first sentence. I’m not opposed to a “good” read.

      Some bloggers need to understand, not everyone is a fictional writer. Certain individuals are published for a reason and not everyone makes the “best-seller” list.

      If all of a sudden, I said “Hm. I’m going to be a writer.” – I’d be horrible. My grammar and lack of adjectives to properly describe…let’s just say… my college 101 writing class, my papers- red ink all the time
      “Too wordy,”
      “Not clear,”
      “See me.”
      “Do YOU even understand what you’re writing?”
      “Do you know when to use a comma?”
      “You need to retake the grammar class and then retake this class.”

      crap.
      (there’s a better descriptive word)

      Double crap?

      Like

  5. Sandi,hen it comes to Freshly Pressed I say…yuck! Nothing new there. I think they forgot what fresh was a long time ago. And now, I don’t even want to be found there, and damn if that probably won’t do it. Then what will I do. Also, I’m at a loss for how others find some things funny. I admit, that I’m an acquired taste, but some of what is considered as humor over there simply defies explanation. And as for some parents who write on how they did it, I sometimes think that the process drained them of the ability to express how they did it in an amusing way. Many drone on like I’m doing here. Oh, and yes I too have clicked on blogger’s avatars only to find their smiling portrait complete without blog. Well, if they had one it must have been Lucille…you know, the missing link! I love backgrounds like you—that’s why I went for strange and mysterious—I don’t want to be like everyone else. But, I also never wanted it to be overly weird either. My posts on the other hand. I know quite a few I’d recommend. Paul Johnson is fabulous,but he doesn’t write often, yet when he does it’s well worth the wait. He has a wealth of post to tickle your funny bone. Here’s his link. http://thegoodgreatsby.com/2011/04/07/things-i-carry-in-my-pocket-for-the-sole-purpose-of-confusing-the-police-in-the-event-of-my-untimely-death/ And then there is http://listofx.com/2015/10/16/10-reasons-donald-trump-president/ always amusing. Good for starters.

    Like

    1. Yes- you are one of my favorites. I like unique. I don’t follow any other bloggers like your posts. You still find a way to write fiction combining with reality, without it reading like a novel. ( too dry, or too long) – There’s a difference, and I’m not explaining it very well. Anyway, that Paul.. the Good Greatsby- I know that person! either from when I first made this blog or from my original blog from years past. Wow, he’s got a lot of followers now. You should see my old blog numbers. I kept getting followers and it hasn’t had a post in a year.

      Like

    2. That’s it, I making you my new literary agent! But yeah, I think people go looking for something different, and all of a sudden they find you. Old blog or not, your posts are probably still new to them. That’s the great thing about blogs, not all of them become dated. 😀

      Liked by 1 person

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