What’s up with my kid?

…on a serious note, – Learning Disability:

Typically my blogs are usually told on the light side.  This is a post from an anxious mom today.  I could use some support from those that are blogger friends, but don’t know us in “real life.”  I need that anonymity right now.

Some of you are aware, I used to have another successful blog.  One where I made blogging friends, just like I am now, and a handful of them are now my facebook friends.  I had that blog linked up to Facebook, so all my friends/family would read.  I haven’t really been on there since I started working again about 2.5 years now.

Part of the reason, is now that my kids are getting older, some of the stories I tell, I have to be careful because the Facebook friends are parents of kids at school, etc.  Those parents are letting the kids read stories, etc.  For instance, my last post on Poopy Picasso.  My son is 11 and wouldn’t appreciate that story being told and getting back to kids at school.  Also, he has always been a struggling student, but now in 5th grade, his differences and quirks, are beginning to stand out to the other kids, and now he’s being teased/bullied more.  Often, by the kids that I’m friends with their parents on Facebook.

To make matters even more challenging, those same parents are Facebook friends with teachers of the school, so when I’m really frustrated at the system, and want to express my frustration with a teacher… it’s crickets on my post, and people come to me at soccer games and say “yeah, I wanted respond- I know what you mean, but I’m facebook friends with some teachers at that school.”

mind you, I don’t teacher bash, but I express frustration at the system and sometimes I feel the teacher fails teaching my son too.

SO hence, the start of this new blog, and me exploring new Blogger Pals.  I’ve only told a few of my past blogger friends about this site.  I don’t have my sites linked.  Separate e-mails, and such.   If someone wanted to find me, they easily could, but no ones going to do that.

With that said, every teacher my son has had, at parent-teacher conference, has indicated, “has he been tested?”  In a world fixated on ADD,  we feel many teachers just want to slap kids into medicine so they are zombies in class.  We explained he didn’t have ADD, or ADHD, as our pediatrician works with kids with these conditions on a daily basis, and he does not have that condition.  However, our doctor did indicate he could possibly have a learning disability that the school would need to test.  So we, parents, looked at each teacher, and expressed our agreement we wouldn’t mind having the school test him…and NOTHING ever came about…

Silly us, we were under the impression, he was just a slow learner- everything is so HARD in school now.  We figured, if it were bad, the teachers would send him to the office and arrange the school psychologist to test him, we already gave our consent.  That they would arrange and tell us their professional opinion.  Well, now the whole budget crisis, and closing of schools, and classroom over-crowding, and special reading programs and such are GONE.  They don’t offer testing of any child, unless they are at the very bottom percent.  (from what I’ve heard other parents talking)

What about those struggling kids in the middle?  The ones who spend HOURS doing homework and has to study so hard for a good grade on a test, meanwhile, fails another test because he can’t study for both simultaneously.

THE SYSTEM- let him slip on by and allowed us to think he was going to grow out of this or mature and things would just take off at some point, like they did for my husband, in Jr. high.  Except, times are different now.  School is much HARDER.  The demand of the students is amazing.  The volume of homework is HUGE.  My son is taking 5th grade tests I took in jr. high.

5th grade has been the year that everything has come to a head.  I’ll tell you more later.  We got an 8am appointment with the school psychologist.  I’m very anxious.  We already have a diagnosis from an outside psychologist and now we are checking with the school district.

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14 thoughts on “What’s up with my kid?

  1. Is there anybody else who could test him for learning disabilities if the school won’t? At least that way, you’d know what was going on and could get him some extra help if there was a specific issue identified.

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    1. Oh, yes, we’ve already gone through an independent psychologist, and she provided her diagnosis and professional opinion that led to this meeting with the school. Now, the school (legal) has to perform testing, and they have 60 days to do so… (that doesn’t include summer vacation)

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  2. First off I totally understand the whole “can’t always blog what the hell we want to” if I bitched and moaned about my husband like I really want to sometimes then I am sure his coworkers who read my blog would have a lot to “say” to him on the bus ride to and from work. As for your son struggling…my 15 year old struggled so badly when I first got together with my husband. He was 8 at the time and the teachers would all ask me why he hadn’t been tested or if I had taken him to the pediatrician to find out if he had certain learning disabilities ….I don’t know…I am just now becoming his step mother and don’t know much about his past (my husband didn’t have custody of his until he was 5 his mother was a drug addict and in and out of jail and he spent a lot of time in and out of child haven while my husband fought the system) Anywho…his biggest problem was math…he had the longest way imaginable of trying to solve a simple math equation but finally I just explained to his teachers that that is the ONLY way he gets it and that as long as he is figuring it out then who are we to tell him it’s wrong. I am happy to say that he eventually grew out of his way of “problem solving” and is now a straight A student. We never had him diagnosed with anything and I just basically tried to help him as much as I could and eventually he learned to handle it himself. Not sure if this helps any and man what a long comment…sorry about that.

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  3. Good luck. Navigating that system is sometimes like working with insurance companies. You have to keep pushing until someone pays attention. Each district is different, some more difficult than others. I hope your son gets any help he deserves.

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    1. thank you. We tried the whole, we’ll just work harder. But, that’s not working anymore, not by itself. And we’re exhausted and our son doesn’t want to go to school anymore. For a district/school with zero tolerance on bullying, they sure are missing the ones in his classroom.

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